Brandon Herbel & Missy Magnuson - The Bones Co.
APRIL 1, 2020 © Right Here, Right Now.
Missy - Today…Feeling a little bit heavy today. I stayed up a little late last night. I think that, as I said, I have peace with where we are as far as Bones Co. and the lack of business that has started to happen just because Brandon’s been able to cover our bills at this point, so the bills are okay. As where my sadness is coming from, it is now truly realizing that I am not going to be able to interact with my mother, who I’m super close with, for her own good and brother and sister-in-law. So I guess that has sunk in but I also feel grateful for where we are. The way I am feeling as an empath is feeling other people's feelings hard because I am safe, but my mom and the way she’s been talking, and then she was told her salary was going to be cut twenty percent and just how she feels right now is making me feel like, oh my gosh, like this is like real. So it’s a little heavy today, so yeah that’s where I’m at. I’m hoping that I can get some energy and utilize this downtime to just be and create, but right now I don’t feel like doing shit, to be honest.
Brandon - I’m feeling good. The anxiety over that last couple of weeks has been pretty heavy too, just knowing that everything is really uncertain, we’re good now, but I know that can change in a blink of an eye. So things are good, I’m thankful to have a job where I work remotely already anyway, and being able to take care of my wife and kids. But I know that what I do as a career is…I didn't know before it was really important to companies but when companies aren’t open and don’t have a business, then what we do is the one thing they’re going to cut first. It’s interesting like I’m feeling good, I’m feeling thankful, but at the same time knowing that what I do and the only thing I know how to do is not something that, you know, after these times, who knows how long it will be, how relevant it was three weeks ago.
Missy - Bones Co. is who we are through and through. The day that we met on May 6th at Hayneedle, the first week I started working there, I had my eye on him and I approached him in the hallway. I fanned out on him because it was his Omaha street signs poster I saw at my friend's house at my Urban Outfitters going away party and I was like “Who does this, who is this person”? and she’s like, “Oh my god, it’s Brandon…he works at Hayneedle…MISSY!” and he was going through a divorce and I was single at the time and I was like “Hmm okay, noted”. I had my radar on and was like “Where is he”? and when I did that he was like “Uh-huh, Uh-huh”. And by the time I got back to my desk he had sent me an email and was like “Oh hi, nice to meet you, if you have any questions let me know, I think we’re going to work closely together…” We have that email printed out and framed in our bedroom, it’s the most adorable shit so that’s where Bones Co. started. I say that because meeting him was like meeting the boy version of me, same clothes, closets all black and white with a couple of neutral things, and just like music and pop culture, we rode the same freaking wave. When we decided to get married I wanted to keep my last name, my son has my last name, and prior to that I started calling him my Bone Daddy, just because he’s so fucking cool, and not just because I love Nightmare Before Christmas because I realize there was a Bone Daddy character in it but because it was more like, he’s got this…he’s my Bone Daddy. And then I was like “Oh, and I’m his Bone Mami” and so that’s where Bone Mami came from. So I started my tiny little clothing brand, Bone Mami before Bones Co. And when we got married we were like, we’re the Bones Family. And the kids are well aware that we are the Bones Family. Our wedding invitations were for the Ceremony of the Bones, come join us, the Bones Family is uniting as one. And so really Bones Co. yes, when we formally released last year in June as an art studio, branding, styling, I mean you name it. It’s just us, it’s who we are through and through and if you’re down with it, we would love to ride the wave with you. So it’s genuinely who we are as people.
Josh - Because your company is who you are and you have this relationship, and this family. When companies are at a point where they can’t hire people like you, like me, and it’s so integrated with who you are, how do you navigate that? Does it feel almost more personal?
Missy - Yeah, right? I totally get where you’re going with that. Because I think that's kind of the thing I’ve been dealing with too where I feel like I’ve been attacked a little bit and I think being in the house 24/7 together, him and I, and the kids every other week. I’m feeling a lot of anger and sadness and kind of turned into this yucky, “Well I’m going to be mean to you”. Not on purpose but like…and so just as creatives and us being both in the same arena we have to be careful to not attack each other because I think you’re right, I think it’s hard to separate the two because it is so who were are? And like are we devalued now as human beings or something? And I haven’t even thought about it until now that we’re speaking out loud about it and perhaps that is a little bit of the sadness and what’s coming through.
Brandon - I think we’re both pretty social people, I don’t know, like myself, I’m an introvert/extrovert. I thrive on being around other people and having conversations and connecting people and just being out there talking to my friends and people within the community. And now that it’s not really even an option…it’s very new right now but I know that’s the other side of it too, in a couple of weeks or month or so, we always talk about just making a positive out of this negative and teaching ourselves new things, like a new way of designing, or reading and taking this time to figure out what our next chapter is and who we want to be, and where we want to be, and the things we want to do. I’m trying to use it as a way to kind of hide away, but now I don’t have a choice to hide away, and now it’s like, “Wait, I want that choice back”.
I feel like I’ve been going through this weird transition in my life just in general, to where this kind of happened at a time where I thought I was getting my feet back on the ground and then I’m like “Oh, it can be taken away at any moment”. My online moniker is “All Work, No Sleep” and you know, we work all the time. That’s like what my life is, that’s who I am, I guess outwardly or how I perceive myself. So taking this time to spend time in the yard, and spend time with the kids, and spend time reading and just kind of pushing myself to be a better person not just for my family and friends and my community, but be a better person for Brandon. I was already kind of going through that, but now I’m in a place where it makes sense to keep riding that wave and keep diving deeper into who I am and who I want to be.
Missy - Yeah, I think we will look back and it seems a little Doomy and Gloomy but there might be some super beautiful things that will come out of it and I think one of them will be a connection to nature. People are going outside again. And I’ve talked to more friends lately than I have in the recent past. So that, and we have kids, and we have always strived to get on a schedule with them and we know, when we’re able to, everything works much more smoothly for us all but it's hard to stay there when you’re so busy with your work, and the family work-life balance. And now that we are kind of forced into this with the kids staying home, I legit have every hour planned out on this poster, it’s huge. And it started on Monday, and yesterday and today. I think we’re going to get there and I think it’s going to be pretty magical, to where we have that walk every morning at 8:15, we go on our walk. And that’s something that we have been wanting to do with them forever. And we would sporadically, but now they look forward to it because it’s part of the schedule. So I think that yes, it’s going to strip us down, strip us naked from being that person that everyone else perceives or having to post all of the things. But with Bones Co., we kind of made that announcement a little while ago, because we used to get in arguments where we were like “What should we post? What should our stories look like'' Should they be like this?” We were like dude we need to focus on who we are, what we have, and the things we want to create. We’re not talking about Instagram anymore. We were like boom, sorry guys, holler at us if you want to…
Brandon - And I don’t know, if you do go to our Instagram we have three posts. (Laughs) It’s a picture of her and a picture of me and in the middle it says…
Missy - …it’s like “We’re too busy, we love you guys, holler at us if you need anything”. We post stories sometimes but it’s not our main focus. Someday maybe we’ll have all of the Bones’ to help out and our Instagram will be fucking curated to the most magical fucking land, but for now…no (Laughs)
Josh - What would you want your kids to know when they’re your age and let's say they hear this recording, what would you want to tell them? What would you want them to remember about you right now at this time?
Brandon - A couple of things, one, it’s all for them. We both had good childhoods but nobody had a perfect childhood, everyone has their situations, but I think we really look to kind of let the kids be who they are, no matter what, and that we are really proud of them.
Missy - My hope is that they would look back at this time and think to themselves “Wow, they really fed our imaginations and were our number one fans and they let us roll with whatever it was we were interested in and they supported us and that they were present”. And that they played (Laughs)
Brandon - We’re so big on family and bringing people together and we do that now in our house currently, but we definitely want to build a house and live in an area where we could have a photo studio, and a design studio, and like a little farm.
Missy - Our dream would be to live on a lake and have enough land that we could build a house for my mom, like a mother-in-law house, maybe my sister and my brother in law would build a house there too, we’re just so tight, and Bones Co. would have a studio.
Brandon - That's the super future. (laughs)
Josh - For someone that is in a similar field, maybe a person younger than you that may be going through a hard time right now, what would you say to that person?
Missy - I would say just do it. Do whatever it is. Like I said today, I didn’t feel like doing shit, and that’s okay for today but tomorrow I need to get the fuck up. And no matter if anyone is paying you or not paying you, do it. For example, a couple of weeks ago, my friends got laid off at Hayneedle, they were in the photo studio with me. We had been talking a lot about, what should we do together, because we love doing product shots like you guys and the Converse stuff, like heartbeat fast, like I just love that shit. So I was like “Okay, what are you going to pick”? I was like, I’ll do Tyku because I love Sake, and one friend picked Mountain Dew because she’s a mountain dew freak, and my other friend picked kombucha and some hair clips. And we were like “Okay, let's do it”. While we were connecting and playing and feeding each other's creative fires we are also building our portfolios and we’re building our brands. Once we get our site up, those are the kinds of things that you have ready to go. So I would say my advice is, don’t let someone else tell you that you’re worth it or don’t wait for somebody else and maybe you’re not going to get paid today but the money will come, just do it.
Brandon - Keep going, yeah, I think one thing that I’ve learned in my successes in my career and in my life is when I stopped talking about it, or worrying about the failure, and just doing it, and when I did want I wanted it became successful because I think it was pure and other people could tell that it was pure and that I wasn’t trying to make a quick buck and not that it’s all about money. It’s finding that balance of doing something that you love that can also provide for you and potentially your family but also just like to provide you as a person in your soul. Creatively, if it’s photography, art, writing, running, just do what makes you happy.
Josh - Is there anything that this time has allowed you to reflect on?
Missy - For me, it would be for sure the physical activity with the children on a daily basis. It was so strange because we were really getting into a groove of working out again before this happened. Like in January I was like Jazzercising almost every day while doing Bones Co. and Bones Co. was busy. We took this super rad transcendental meditation course and were meditating twice a day for a while. Then once this happened it kind of threw us a little bit. So yesterday I was like “Yeah girl, get up, you’re being weird, you know what it takes”. So I got up and set an alarm and meditated in the morning and it just sets your day up. So I think this will allow us to get back into that routine. So we were like in this really cool transitional time as is, and then all of a sudden there was this whole other thing. It's like “Woah, wait a second”. But I can totally see the light in it. And like I said, I think it’s with the kids is where it’s really going to start churning and feel like we are really accomplishing something bigger with them involved as well.
Brandon - Step away from the computer, go outside. Not worry so much about a deadline. Just enjoy what you have, even if it’s a little, just be thankful and appreciate it.
Missy - Just as a reminder to ourselves and to others, it’s such a wild time and full of mixed emotions for everyone and just to really remember to let peace be your compass and grace be your guide and just be kind to each other. And it’s almost a reminder to myself because I was in a mood today.
Brandon - She was.
Missy - Big time. And I think it is a combination of a lot of different things. Even the conversation with my mom this morning, and the kids, it’s a lot you know? But just remember to be kind and that this too will pass. It always does, it always does, it always does.
